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Probably...

A month ago I did something that I probably should not have done. I thought it was needed to change a few things for the better. I thought it would help me in letting go of the past. Perhaps, I was wrong.

What would you do if your life is haunted by the past? I ran. I hide. I came out to face the truth. I tried to make amends. I prayed. I did it all. But it just won’t go away. A witch-doctor could probably helps. But lets just say I’m not into that kind of stuff. Not that I don’t believe it, but lets just not list that as an option. Maybe I’m meant for all these. Maybe I’m meant to be in this tale of lies and broken promises. Maybe this is my punishmnt for not staying true to my words. Maybe…

Truth hurts.

Katakanlah yang benar walaupun ianya pahit. Sepahit-pahit hempedu pasti akan ku telan jua.

Really? Would you really swallow? And live with all that bitterness? Or would you rather just spit it out and forget about it?

I thought I was ready to know the truth. I thought I was ready to swallow. But when the time came, the truth was bigger and much more bitter than expected, harder to swallow. I tried anyway. But it got stuck in my throat. Diludah mati mak, ditelan mati bapak. Dibiar boleh membengkak, last-last mungkin aku yang mati.

I’m an introvert. For me some things are better left unsaid. But probably too many things have been left unsaid. Probably…

posted by judE|n @ 3:27 PM